Thursday, September 11, 2008

Disappointment

I'm feeling very low, lower than I have for months.

I applied for a job recently, a job I really wanted, and for which I think I was well-suited and amply qualified.

I got a phone call today telling me I didn't get the job.

I feel disappointed, depressed and mad.

Mad at the employer for not choosing me, mad at God for not letting me have the job, or not moving the employer to make the right choice (me!), mad at myself for getting my hopes up when I should have known better. (There is a history and politics involved that I'm not going to go into but it really shouldn't have surprised me to miss out.)

Yet, I really wanted the job. I really believe I'd have been good at it. I believe the timing and circumstances were right. It is very disheartening to be rejected.

It's hard to be philosophical right now about something this significant. Perhaps I'll feel more acceptance of it in a few days but right now I'm just unhappy.

9 comments:

itinerantindigent said...

I'm sorry to hear that mate.
(long silence). Not sure what to add to that. I'd been wondering if you were looking at a change in work, for a while. I'd like to know what it was you wanted to head towards, at some point.
Maybe God is mad at the employer for not picking you. or maybe God has something worse for you.

itinerantindigent said...

I'm sorry to hear that mate.
(long silence). Not sure what to add to that. I'd been wondering if you were looking at a change in work, for a while. I'd like to know what it was you wanted to head towards, at some point.
Maybe God is mad at the employer for not picking you. or maybe God has something worse for you.

itinerantindigent said...

I'm so sorry to hear it, I wanted to repeat myself

Jacqui said...

I'm sorry to Marcus, please don't stay mad at everyone and especially not at God.
Love you, mum

Anonymous said...

Marcus,
I to am disappointed.
Hang in there, maybe you could watch last years grand final again to unwind.

Only a phone call away
Dave
BSHS

Peter said...

Bad luck??? about the job Marcus, now would be a good time to look at all the things you HAVE done and all the positives that make up your life.

Anonymous said...

Mate, what can I add, I'm glad I'm not the only one that gets cheesed off with the big boss now and again. Unfortunately we have to wait for hind sight before we see the Gods)bigger picture. Mate on the upside I guess the tribe still loves ya, the cats are going well, the Giants won and spurs will be be in the EPL at least to the end of the season. If you start singing 'don't worry be happy' give me a call. Dave S

Joshua Brinen said...

Dear Marcus-

I am not in tune with the higher powers at work in our world as I should be, but I am certain about one thing - the Big Guy has another path for you. I trust in the Big Guy to steer while I paddle.

The only times I've been royally screwed is when I did not heed the warnings of the Big Guy.

And boy did he let me have it.

Something about that job was not right for you, and by you not getting it, its saving you a world of hurt.

If you'd like, shoot me an e-mail about a certain job I did not get about seven years ago.

Best, from New York,

-Joshua

Anonymous said...

Marcus it's politics and it's not personal. You may be the best person for the job because of your influence, strength, presence and power. Those are all GOOD things when used to help and advocate for others. However, a person hiring you, who does not have these qualities will see you as a threat. You are a threat because of your integrity, your strength FOR people and your relentless passion for justice. That doesn't sit well with someone who wants ultimate power. I won't be so stupid enough to say it is a compliment to miss out on the job because it is not. Don't be disheartened for too long. Be wise, careful and true. There is much ahead outside of the sphere you are currently in and looking in. With best wishes,